Togetherness

Recently my wife and I completed 12 years of togetherness. We were just going through the memory lane and realizing what worked for us and what did not! The years had been rollercoaster of events, emotions and actions. One thing that stood out most importantly was strengthening of the resolve that we will always be together.

I still dread the days when she goes out vacationing with our kids. Even with all the independence and the fun and frolicking with friends, there is a big void deep in the heart longing for the family. I was happy that we did share the same feeling.

While discussing, we digressed from ourselves and wondered how the other people fared – particularly those who remain single. Being a male-chauvinist (my wife often holds me up to that), I would try to delve into the stories involving the male spinsters. Spinster is a word used for describing an old childless woman who has never been married. However, for the lack of a better word, I call the male counterpart a Male Spinster!

There is a story from Skanda Purana which exemplifies the need for a marriage –

Sumedha and Somavata were two poor Brahmin priests. Since they were poor, no one was ready to give their daughters to them in marriage. They tried desperately to secure charity from the kings or queens to be able to lead a happy married life. They were directed to a generous queen Simantini, who offered generous gifts and lunch to a Brahmin couple every day. While Sumedha and Somavata pondered upon ways to receive charity from Simantini, they came up with an idea. Sumedha dressed up as a woman and accompanied Somavata into queen's palace. The queen Simantini, saw Sumedha and Somavata as Parvati and Shiva and worshipped them accordingly. She fed them nicely and offered rich gifts. Her offering was so piety that Sumedha did turn into a woman and developed a liking towards Somavata. Somavata then married his friend Sumdha and used the gifts from the queen to setup their home and live happily ever after.

The above story tells the effect of loneliness on a person and the extent to which one changes the behavior to get rid of the loneliness.

It is also said that being loved is far more important than loving someone. A feeling that you are wanted by someone can give you a boost in your attitude, personality and commitment.

There is another story from Koothandavar sthala purana that not only talk about loneliness but also the wish for being loved –

During the Mahabharata war, the Pandavas were advised to offer a sacrifice to goddess Kali. The sacrifice was supposed to be a youth with an unscarred perfect body to win the battle against Kauravas. The search for the suitable sacrificial candidate ended at Aravan – Arjuna's son from the Naga princess Ulupi. Aravan agreed to climb up the sacrificial altar upon one condition – he wanted a wife who would mourn for him. This was quite a difficult demand as no one wanted to marry a young prince who was to die the very next morning. Finally, Krishna took the disguise of Mohini and agreed to marry Aravan. Aravan treated her as his wife and was sacrificed the next morning. Upon his death Mohini mourned as Aravan's widow. Aravan upon his death became Lord Koothandavar whose temple is in the Koovagam village in Villupuram district of Tamil Nadu. It is said that every year there is an 18 day celebration in which Arvanis / Alis / eunuchs / transgender / transvestite people marry him for a night before his annual death. The celebration is for 18 days since Draupadi granted a boon to Aravan that he caould see the entire Mahabharata war even after his death. It is said that Aravan's head was mounted on a pole and his eyes were open to witness the war. Since then, Aravan's head is kept at the four corners of any temple to ward off spirits.

 

 

Sale

Last week all my friends and we went out shopping during the greatest shopping fever in USA – Black Friday. To add the icing, today is the Cyber Monday – thereby adding wonderful deals on the internet encouraging the shoppers to shop around if they missed anything on the Friday. While on the way back home and discussing our loots, we discussed how consumer centric have all the festivals became? The day – "Black Friday" was supposed to be the "day after thanksgiving". As a tradition, the family would get together for the dinner on Thanksgiving Day and discuss their ideas. Getting clues from the discussions, the enthusiasts would then go out and buy the gifts to place under the Christmas tree. And look what has Black Friday turned out to be?

Is this insane? Does this happens only in US? Don't we Indians, despise such an expose of consumerism?

NO.

Just look at the lines of the consumers hoarding at the jewelers to buy gold on "Akshaya Tritiya" or the large number of shoppers buying metal on "Dhanteras". Ever noticed, how all the sales are offered around the major festivals be it global or regional?

The question then asked is why is there a mixture of the rituals along with the sales to promote consumerism. Well, they have always been together.

All our religion and the holidays are geared towards expanding the culture and helping the society. Growth is measured in terms of the accumulation of wealth or the realization of Lakshmi. Almost all of our functions or holidays or events tell us to buy new clothes, articles or even idols of gods. These have become rituals as we have been following them the same way in the past and want to follow them in the similar manner. Consider the growth of the society in this cycle – A household works hard to accumulate Lakshmi. The household later spends the same in the market (or gives it to the business) to get something to appease him, show off his acquisition of Lakshmi and at the same time – to complete the ritual. The business which takes the money from the household, in turn passes it on to the others who continue to produce the articles for which the Lakshmi is exchanged. This is a cycle. The more you spend, the better is the society. The better is the society, the better you live. After all we all strive for a better life, aren't we?

This phenomenon has not spared the God either. Look at Vishnu. Clad in golden clothes, wearing different types of cosmetics and even multiple jewelry. To decorate an idol of Vishnu, one needs to get to a clothes merchant, a jeweler, an idol maker and probably a painter as well. These will in turn reach out to their own industry for the raw materials. Every incarnation of Vishnu has been business friendly considering this. On the other hand consider the Shivalinga – not a great business friendly example. But wait till Shiva is transformed into Shankara through marriage with Parvati or is attracted by the Mohini avatar of Vishnu.

This transformation is actually realization of the needs. This is what we call as Marketing in the B-School.

We – Indians have all of it in us – turning business friendly, warlike or even knowledge oriented at any given instance. It's tough to say who is what at the given moment.

Victimization of Self

"I could have done better in the exams, if the neighbor had kept the music on a lower volume"

"These stupid people don't know when to stop partying. Can't they see I'm focusing for my interview?"

"I find happiness in other's happiness. I have given away myself for the others."

I am sure, we all come across such statements every day. We often know and revere the originators of such statements.

May I please have the liberty to hurt your feelings and call these revered people as cowards?

Yes these people are cowards who shy away from taking the responsibilities on their head and solving it. It is the easiest path for anyone to walk away from our responsibilities. After all, the world was created by the God for all of us to live happily or live with the consequences of our choices. God made all of us equal – giving the choice and the ability to think through. Then why do we blame someone else for our happiness? It is because we do not want to take up the responsibility on our shoulders and work towards it! Why do you think most of us complain about our boss or the workplace? Because, if you do not complain of them, the responsibility of your growth falls on you!

May a times we also find some people who not only complain of everything, make you the reason for their suffering too!. Be careful. Life is what we choose it to be. Never a bed of roses – we all know for sure. Every action or inaction in life has its consequence. I learnt somewhere that leaders are not who always take the right decisions, but those who make their decisions and live by the same.

Vacancies – Positions open – Deva or Asura?

We have all heard innumerable stories about the Devas or Suras and their arch-rivals Asuras. The story of their enmity has often taken heights and has been showcased by multiple high grossing Hollywood as well as Bollywood movies. Do you know that there are positions available amongst the Suras and Asuras equally if you are interested?

Many of us might recall the Sura and Asura are both brothers from the same father – Maharishi Kashyap but different mothers – Diti and Aditi. Due to their constant strife for power they are both assigned different homes – the sky (Heaven or Swarga) and underground (Patala), We have always visualized the Suras as the nice looking heroes who are always struggling to keep ugly looking, wrong doing Asuras at bay from capturing their abode.

Let's take a slightly distorted view and consider them equal and then understand them both!

• Both Devatas and Asuras are the offspring of the same maharishi.
  
• They are both the creatures of the same God – Lord Brahma
  
• They both fight for the same Lakshmi
  

However, there are a few differences as well –

• The Devatas strive to maintain their abode in Swarga, they never venture out of their territory. The Asuras on the other hand, do not consider the territory to be the binding factor. They are always looking to increase their territory.
  
• The Devatas always strive to keep the Lakshmi, while the Asuras always strive to get Lakshmi.
  
• The Devatas represent stagnation while the Asuras represent growth. 
  
• It is almost always seen that the killing of Asuras liberates or makes Lakshmi, while a downfall of Devata brings sadness
  
• Thefight amongst them is vertical – Up vs Down
  

So are the Asuras evil? Remember, "Evil" means absence of God. But we know, that the God is omnipresent and omniscient and nothing exists if God I not present!

So are Asuras evil? Nope. They are what the Devas are not. They represent the industriousness, relentlessness, hard work, ambition and growth. The only thing they lack is adherence to Dharma. For them the growth is their dharma. Throughout their quest for Lakshmi, they do not care for Saraswati – the goddess of knowledge. In little times, when they do care for Saraswati, it is to get Lakshmi and forget Saraswati later. Hence this phenomenon is referred to as VidyaLakshmi.

Remember the good Asuras who created legend for all of us – Prahalad (son of Hiranyakashyap) and his descendents – Virochan, Bali. Virochana – Prahlada's son followed the path of dharma and believed that his salvation would come if he helped others in their desires. Vishnu desires his neck and Virochana gives it away by beheading himself. Bali, his son, is no different! Bali gave away his entire empire to "Vaman Deva" – an incarnation of Vishnu only to live in Patala (Underground). What we do not realize is that the growing size of the Vamana avatara of Vishnu represents the growing form of the human desires.

Like it or not, the story says that there were good Asuras and there were bad Suras too. Being industrious and hardworking, the Asuras kept creating Lakshmi. Lakshmi on the other hand, came to being when the underground was mined or worked upon or killing of Asuras – choose what you like.

Probably, this is the reason why God likes them too. But the God creates a delicate balance for the nature to survive!

None of them bad! They both have good qualities. Choose what you are and when!

Kauravas in heaven

A few weeks ago, in my blog on "Did Yudhishthira went to heaven?" I mentioned that he saw Kaurava brothers in the heaven. And he was enraged. But do we know why?

Kuru – the great ancestor of the Pandavas and Kauravas once tilled a land close to Hastinapuri – his capital. He tilled the earth with such determination that he used his flesh as the seeds and his blood as the water for the seeds to germinate. Upon seeing this, Indra descended from his throne and asked Kuru for his wish. Kuru requested nothing for himself, but for others. He asked ascension to heaven for anyone who dies on the land he tilled. Though Indra could not refuse Kuru's request, he added a condition that the person must die as a warrior.

The land was later known as Kurukshtera and all who died (mainly Kauravas) ascended to heaven for just having died on the land.

Sometimes, we may have done our best and have been the most righteous of all, yet we may not be the one to achieve success. Never loose the hope. There are bigger things in play than you think. Remember, the scale on which the success or failure is determined is created by man. And hence the scale changes with time. What you can do is to set the scale in relative terms for yourself. Since you remain the subject all the time and you remain the measured quantity the scale works better when you measure how much good you did for yourself and others. Never try to judge yourself from other's perspectives.

If there is someone who can remember you, you have conquered the world.

Long ago, there was a king Indradyumna. He went to Swarga of his great deeds. However, after a few years he was sent back to the earth since his account of good deeds was drained. He was told if he could find anyone who could remember him, he can come back to swarga. Indradyumna went to the oldest man on earth who couldn't recognize the old king. However, the old man pointed the king to an old owl. The owl pointed the king to a swan who directed him to a turtle. The old turtle remembered the king and thanked him for the lake he built. The king couldn't recollect anything about the lake. The king had once donated so many of his cows that the earth moved by the moving of the cows from the shelter. This trough formed in the shelter area later became a pond and then the lake where the turtle lived. The king then got his right to get back to the swarga. Hence, knowingly or unknowingly, if you help others, you are sure to succeed.

Violence - where does it all starts?

Tune in into any channel or read any newspaper. You will be looking at innumerable news filled with violence in many forms –political, poverty, castes, racism, domestic and even sex. The first thing I would have thought was disgust and anger for the one who inflicted violence. At the same time, the feeling for sympathy comes in for the victim.

I have often asked where does the violence starts? Is it only the result of the social or poverty injustice or is it inbuilt part of the human nature? I guess both. While there has been a great deal of discussion on the former reasoning, I shall work on the later part here!

Imagine a forest with a tiger and a deer. The deer is running all over chased by the tiger. Finally when the tiger catches the deer, the tiger rips the deer with it claws and tears the flesh of the deer’s skin with its teeth. The tiger savors the deer and then moves on looking for another prey another day. A violent story, ain’t it? I say NO.  This is the story of the survival. The tiger has to kill the deer for itself to survive. The deer has to run and save itself or else it will be killed.

Now let’s talk of another story – King Shibi and the dove. This story is very famous in both the Hindu scriptures as well as the Buddhist Jataka tales.

Once upon a time, king Shibi was very famous for his generous and altruistic character. Once a dove flew into the lap of the king looking for shelter. The dove was being chased by an eagle. The king immediately granted sanctuary to the dove. The eagle then cried foul and asked the king to feed his hunger. The king offered the food for eagle weighing equal to the dove. No food in the entire kingdom could match the dove’s weight. Finally Shibi started to cut himself in order to feed the eagle.

In one version of the tales, the eagle and the dove transformed into the gods and praised Shibi. Shibi was then offered a way to heaven.

In the other version, the eagle then stopped Shibi and called him fool. Enraged, Shibi asked him the reason for such salutation? The eagle explained – “If you take the dove away from me, you may save the dove but my family would die of hunger. If you give your body to me, what happens to my hunger tomorrow? Who would save this dove from me tomorrow? Who would take care of your kingdom tomorrow? Who would take care of the subjects and ensure a better life for tomorrow? Saving the dove is great, but is also against the nature. It’s the wish of the god who made dove weak and gave an eagle the hunger for the dove.”

This similar idea is also displayed in the Vishnu Purana – “Matsya Avtar” through the “Matsyay Nyay” or the rule of the wild. The big fish easts the small fish to survive and any disruptions in this cycle would lead to devastations as experienced by Manu. The great Manu was approached by a small fish and the fish requested – save me from the bigger fishes today and someday I shall save you. Manu took the fish to his home and kept her in a small vessel. The fish outgrew the vessel and many more with time while Manu kept transferring her to the bigger one. Manu couldn’t believe that his small fish has become the big fish now and can fend for itself. Finally one day when Manu couldn’t hold her in the pond or the lake or the river, had to let go of the fish in the sea. This was the time of the great deluge or “Pralay”. The Vishnu purana says that the same fish came to save Manu and his family’s boat. This fish was the first embodiment of the Lord Vishnu. This story teaches two concepts for the early mankind – empathy and the law of the jungle.

Thus violence for me is also the need for survival. The humane in us should be able to judge when the need subsides and when the cruelty starts.

 

 

Swarga – The heaven

The hindu scriptures are full of the mention of a place called "Swarga" or the heaven. The place – highly revered, is the ultimate aim of every human being. The demons fight with the gods all the time to gain access to the heaven. Also, even the gods when banished or exiled from the heaven try their best to get back. What is so special about the place called "Swarga"?
Swarga is a place where one goes when they have led their life rightfully and have done enough good deeds to earn their place in the heaven. One goes there to find the most important things –

1. Kalpavriksha or Kalpataru – The tree that showers anything you wish
2. Akshya Patra – The bowl that overflows with gold and food without an end
3. Chintamani – The gem that relieves all your worries
4. Kamadhenu – The cow which gives all you ask for
5. And obviously the ever beautiful apsaras

At the same time, we know that the king of swarga is Indra. A strong king but an anxious, nervous, fearful being who gets trembling as soon as some king on the earth performs a yajna. When any demon start coming to the doors of swarga, Indra gets worried. When a rishi performs a tapa, Indra is worried and tries to send his apsaras to lure the rishi away. What is he worried of? Indra is worried of losing the control of swarga. And when he or the gods can't control the situations or in case of defeat they run to the savior for help.
Let's draw a parallel into our own lives.
Think of your own organization or business. Every one of us is looking for at least the first four elements of swarga. They are all looking for an infinite source of investment, a never dying hunger for their products or services, absolutely no worries of competition or of resource problems. In our own different ways we all act like Indra and take on tensions and issues on our head which should be let go since we can't do much about them. Our focus should be in converting ourselves from Indra to the savior "Vishnu" as the time demands.
Always remember, while Indra craves for Lakshmi, she sits by the foot of Vishnu.

What do you eat?

Ain't that a popular saying? And probably true too. What you eat, reflects on you in various manners. However, I want to share a different perspective on the food and the way it is served. Once again, the thought is borrowed and is being reproduced with my touch below. I would like to give away the credits to Mr Devdutt Pattnaik – a great thinker and a wonderful storyteller.

I was watching the Masterchef program and I was amazed at how the participants prepared the four course meal and also how they prepared the regional cuisine thali's. I started thinking the difference in the Thali and the four course meal. When a four course meal is served, the cutlery and the plates are laid out on the table. The chef or the server then brings out one course at a time and you are supposed to eat it using the utensils laid out in the manner from outside working towards in. You are expected to eat the served food with minimum alterations – adding salt or pepper. Every course is brought on after the previous one is finished and taken away.

Contrastingly, the thali is served with all the food served at once. Though the chef prepares different items in the thali with different recipe, you still have the liberty to pick and choose the items you want to eat in any order you wish. Not only you can eat different items in any order, you can also mix multiple items together to create a new flavor.

Analyzing the two different foods above, you see an example of controlled release wherein you control the way your product is utilized. The product is not customizable, but is easy to use and provides satisfaction even while controlling the user behavior. The other example is of a product which provides the features, but allows the users to customize itself and use it in any manner they wish. The customizability can lead to a situation wherein the originator can't even identify with the end product. Let's see if you can identify examples of both these kinds?

Brahma’s fifth head

Brahma the creator of the universe is always seen with four heads. All of us must have heard different stories upon the significance of the four heads of Brahma. Some one says that the four heads represent the four "yugas" or the largest measure of time. Some say the heads are in four different directions to be able to see all around and be omniscient and omnipresent.

What is lesser known is that Lord Brahma was known to have five heads. There are two propagated stories depicting how the fifth head of Lord Brahma was lost.

Story 1

Brahma had the fifth head of a donkey. Once there was a war amongst the gods and the asuras. The gods were in a winning situation and the defeated asuras were fleeing away from the battlefield. Just then the gods realized that the donkey head of Brahma started calling out to the asuras requesting them not flee. The donkey head offered help to the asuras and told them ways to fight and defeat the gods. All the gods were furious at this display and requested Vishnu's intervention. The gods requested Vishnu to cut the fifth o the donkey head of Brahma. While Vishnu granted this wish, he also warned that if the chopped head falls down, the entire universe would be destroyed. The gods then requested Shiva to hold the chopped head of Brahma and he agreed. The place where Shiva finally rested the chopped head of Brahma is known as Rudratirtha, near Badrinatha.

Story 2

Brahma created various creatures, god, asuras, facets of life and nature. Finally he created a woman and named her Shatarupa – one who takes a hundred forms. He was fascinated with this creation of his. His fascination with Shatarupa was so great that he became obsessed with her. He could leave her out of his sight. She tried to escape Brahma's gaze by moving in different directions, and Brahma grew heads to keep her in sight. Then Shatarupa ascended upward hoping to escape, but then Brahma grew the fifth head facing upwards. Shatarupa then requested Shiva for help. Here are two versions on how Shiva helped –

• Version 1 – Shiva cut off Brahma's head and held it on his trident. He then rested the trident in Rudratirth.
  
• Version 2 – Shiva unleashed Rudra on Brahma. Rudra was also Brahma's creation. Rudra then destroyed Brahma's head by his claws and beak.
  

Since Brahma felt ashamed of the sin he committed towards his own daughter – Shatarupa, he is ever since chanting Vedas to absolve himself of the sins.

The moral of either stories is that when an organ or a person starts becoming a nuisance and is not performing upto the requirements, it's better to cut it off. We need to understand the purpose to realize the bigger perspectives than smaller gains or losses. Always realize what you need, what you can do than being happy or sad on little gains.

 

Ravana’s ten heads

On the occasion of Dussehra, I watched burning Ravana's effigy. The kids were excited and the crowd was enthralled. The entire celebration was construed as a fair. We even joked around that Ravana could never wear a round neck t-shirt or didn't need any one for chorus! Great enjoyment, but then the questions arose. Is there a man with ten heads? How would a man with ten heads look like? What are those ten heads? How would they behave? Do the ten heads speak on their turn or all at the same time?

Ravana's heads are best described in Anand Neelkantan's "Asura: Tale of the vanquished". He goes on to explain the ten heads as embodiment of the ten base emotions –

1. Anger
   
2. Pride
   
3. Jealousy
   
4. Happiness
   
5. Sadness
   
6. Fear
   
7. Selfishness
   
8. Love
   
9. Ambition
   
10. Mind (Devoid of all the above factors)
    

Ravana was educated that the nature gave him one head for the purpose of keeping only the tenth quality and not the first nine. A person with only the tenth head is slated to rise and shine.

Ravana did question the suggestion of 9 heads; and provide wonderful logic. Let's see how much we grasp and where?

Playing a devil's advocate, let me tell you the other part of the story –

• A misdirected anger can be harmful. Anger blinds your judgment. However, should you not be angry when you see the injustice? Should you not utilize your anger to electrify your emotions and push you into the right direction?
  
• Why shouldn't you be proud of your achievements? You worked hard and did you best. Why shouldn't you recognize your efforts?
  
• Jealousy motivates us. It helps us moving ahead. What's the harm in a healthy competition?
  
• Equanimity in sadness and happiness is close to being inhumane. How can you not be sad or happy for a loved one if not yourself?
  
• Why shouldn't you be afraid of death? Why shouldn't you plan for your loved ones after your death? We fear death not because we will be gone, but for our loved ones.
  
• You have gained a lot through sweating, Shouldn't you protect your gains? Why should your protection be called as selfishness? Selfishness – often leads to building empires. Shouldn't you be selfish and build something that others cherish?
  
• Whys shouldn't you love? Why should love be a base emotion? If so, why does a mother loves the child? Why should god love the humans?
  

Being able to draw a thin line and acknowledging is a true meaning of Vijayadashmi to me.

Let's ask ourselves, which head did we curb this Dussehra? Which Ravana did we kill this year? If we didn't are we qualified enough to celebrate the festival or burn the effigy of a person who was way more learned than us?

Rules

How many number of times would you have felt frustrated with some rules? And while in the same frustration mode, you would have exasperatedly questioned "who hell made that rule?"

This happens to all of us. Different time, and different place but to all of us.

Rules represent a manner in which each behavior must happen. Rules define boundaries to every code of conduct and define the parameters. The parameters (or metrics in the management terminology) are the basics to judgment. This classifies whether the conduct on the scales of morality, justness and righteousness.

We all follow the rules as they are everywhere. There is a rule for even our basis existence. Rules slowly become the laws, through enforcements. Our rituals are also rules followed by us in view of pleasing the gods.

Let's try to understand the origin of the rules. The rules are constructed as guidelines for behavior to uphold the principles. Having said this, I would also stress on the fact that the rules are bound with time and place and hence are circumstantial. Anything which is circumstantial is temporary. Consider this example – A north indian meal focusses on a wheat bread and puts rice in a bowl to add the taste. A south indian meal on the other hand focuses on the varieties of rice and provides wheat bread on the side. This ritual or a custom is based on the fact that paddy is grown in Southern India and wheat is grown in Northern India.

In our own quest for being known as a good person, we just follow the rules without understanding the underlying principle. Thus keeping the letter of the law we miss the intent. Are we becoming like Duryodhana, Dhritrashtra and Bhishma? They followed the law that could do whatever to their slave and yet disrobed their own daughter-in-law in front of everyone?

It was the rule of the "Raghukul" which Rama followed and went to exile. It was also the law of the land for the king to have a wife of remarkable reputation. Since a lowly citizen of Rama Rajya raised a finger on Sita's reputation, a pregnant lady was sent to the forest. Was following the rule right?

Rama followed his father's request and went to exile. This way he not only creates an empire but also cleanse the earth of the unruly asuras. Bhishma also follos his father's wish and creates a dynasty that led the whole India to the most bloody war. Following your father's wish or command is a rule. Is this rule right?

Rules are helpful in taming the desires and ambitions of the mighty over the meek. They help the meek to survive. But aren't they also hampering the free will of the mighty? Could be the mighty may provide a net new way of leading the life? An interesting comment from Devdutt Pattaik is "Rules don't make Ram Rajya. Rules make tamed animals".

I believe the principle is more important than the law or the rule itself.

The hindu dharma – based on the Vedic literature talks about principles and not rules or rituals or laws. The biblical, judeo-islamic cultures however, do talk of the set of rules dictated by the god himself or his messenger. I, in no way am qualified to question the righteousness of any of the rules. But understanding the principle and the circumstances that led to the rule will make it easy to follow whatever you want.

Did Yudhishthir go to heaven?

In the last few chapters of Mahabharata, "Svargarohanika Parva" to be precise, Veda Vyasa introduces a nice little story. And as we understand that every story has a moral or a purpose.

After the Mahabharata war, Pandavas ruled their kingdom for 36 years. In the 36^th year, the desire for giving up and moving to the heaven took on them. All the five brothers and their wife – Draupadi started to climb the mountain which was to take them to the heaven or "Swarg". On the way, all four brothers and Draupadi died leaving Yudhishthir alone on his journey.

Upon reaching the heaven, Yudhishthir saw his 100 Kaurava cousins in there but neither his Pandava brothers not his wife Draupadi. He felt anguish in him and charged the gods that they were being unfair by giving heaven to Kauravas and denying the same to his brothers and wife. This anguish shone on him like anger.

He charged the gods for being unfair and giving heaven to treacherous, murderous, unjust Kauravas.

The gods then asked him, what did he do to go to heaven?

Yudhishthir reminded them of the rightful, just life he led. He told them how he upheld the Dharma or the principles throughout his life. He told them of all the sacrifices he made during his journey to the heaven – his kingdom, personal riches, chariots even clothes. He told them that he never turned back even when his most beloved wife and his brothers passed away. He let go of everything that was dear to him.

"Everything" – The gods exclaimed, and asked the reason for his anguish and anger for the Kauravs?

Yudhishthir realized.

He had given up all his worldly possessions.

He had given up all his relations.

He had given up all his desires.

He hadn't given up his hatred for the Kauravas.

He hadn't forgiven the Kauravas.

He hadn't given up on his anger.

He hadn't 'let-go' of all that happened even after 36 years.

Once Yudhishthir understood this, he bowed to the gods and asked for forgiveness. He was told that the heaven image he saw was an illusion to make him realize.

 

But again the question is, did Yudhishthir really go to heaven? Did he stay there? Forever?

Update – I realized I missed writing my own interpretation on this.

To me the purpose of this story was "Forgive" and "Let Go". One does not only holds the worldly possessions and relations. But also the thoughts. We need to clear ourselves of the thoughts as well when cleansing ourselves. In my view this is what Yudhishthir missed.

There is one more story that showcases agony of the anger. I shall write that again later.